Spiderman 3

***SPOILER ALERT***

Prill doesn't think it's worth watching. I disagree.

Spiderman 3 was the funniest film I've seen in ages. It beat Blades of Glory, despite none of the outfits matching the peacock costume. It also contained the most important scientific revelation of the decade: What turns people emo.


The Crow pose and the Emo haircut

So apparently there's some evil black symbiotic stuff that attatches itself to you and exaggerates your attributes, such as being an emo boy. Being Spidey, he also gets to dance like JT, so there's a payoff, but still, watch out for that black stuff. If you're not up to Spidey standards it can make you seriously unattractive:



For the main middle section of this film I was literally laughing out loud constantly. There's the French Maitre D', the haircut, the Adams Family Tango, the haircut, the jazz hands bit to the two chicks in the street, the haircut, the blatant reference to Piers Morgan, the haircut...

Sure, the last part of the film seems to be lacking a load of deleted scenes, for example Peter fits his Richie Rich mate, blows him up with his own goblin grenade and then reappears and he's gone straight to the cool scars and milky eye stage with no real explanation of the time interval or what happened in it. The two baddies who team up together are neither very well developed, but what the hell. After the Grierson-Rickford Aunt Sally (TM) staid, boring good little hero-boy start, this film is FUN.

"Civilian Casualties"

Yet again, coalition forces are accused of killing civilians willy-nilly. Yet again, the BBC shows its anti-American left wing core values. Yet again, the reality is probably somewhat different.

A dead civilian in Afghanistan is simply a body without a gun. Over a hundred houses were apparently destroyed. Why? This is not an Israeli firezone clearing exercise. This is not Mugabe cutting down on unemployment by bulldozing slums and turning people back out into the countryside to starve instead. This is house to house fighting. If the guys with guns run into a house and start firing from it and you've got tanks, you just flatten the place. If the women and children haven't got out, is that your fault for firing without knocking on the door and checking, or the Afghans' fault for using a house full of kids as cover?

The problem with invading Afghanistan is that it is populated by the most bloody minded stubborn bastards in the world, for whom guerilla war against the foreign invader is not just part of their history but their entire culture. They are Pratchett's D'regs. They attack at dawn because attacking at dawn is a great and glorious cultural tradition. In D'reg language, the word for "stranger" is the same as the word for "target."

Pace Gladiator:

"People should know when they're conquered."

"Would you, Quintus? Would I?"

Liberty, Equality, Perversity

Woman sleeps with 14 year old boy: minimum sentence of 15 months. How long a sentence would a 34 year old man who slept with a 14 year old girl get?

More importantly, why would anyone sleep with THIS?!

Floreat Uttlesford

According to a reader's digest poll Uttlesford is the 10th best place to raise a family in the country, out of 408. Giggity. It's apparently slipped from 1st in a previous one though...

I <3 Band Geeks

The best bit's about 4.40 in. Until then you can just admire the costumes... my personal favourite is the Bowser bass drummer...

Most Excellent!

I have an excuse... I was preparing my costume for an important event. The attack of Paint was completely necessary too...

Hymen Potter

The new Harry Potter covers have been released. All keen beans say w00t!

"If Wolverine was female, would his hymen grow back every time?" - Jim. Ah, it's good to be home.

This is Iran

Oops. Apparently the Persians, or more specifically the Iranians, are upset by 300. It's obviously an Alexander Nevsky style propaganda film aimed at building support for a US-UK invasion of Iran. Sure it is. There's a Brit in the lead role just to make sure of it. Not a film version of a cartoon version of a Greek saga at all. It's pure fallacy that Persians suck at fighting and got beaten by 300 products of the biggest homicidal cult ever. They had 700 helpers holding another pass, for one thing. Besides, in the Will Thorne (TM) ratings it must be good, it doesn't have Orlando Bloom in.

Anyone up for a holiday viewing?

[All trademarks used with flagrant disregard for the holder's likely superior knowledge of the film, the period, the politics and Rob's mum.]

Hokay

Yesterday. Tori's birthday. Blog's birthday. Three years. Haven't blogged for about three weeks. But why?

I AM LE TIRED.

But seriously, my internet's buggered up in the house yet again, plus a certain factor has been distracting me. My bad.

So, in brief, but WITH pictures...

Head of the Taff 2007: Morning we raced in fours, afternoon in an eight. My seat came off after a few hundred metres of the 3.4km and I did the rest of the race sliding on my arse, with consequent huge oozing sores. Yummy.



The next weekend: OTC Royal Engineers Competition, Minley Barracks, Surrey. Endurance run with a stretcher made of a chunk of tank track (team pictured below, after the general group one), command task, bridge building and boat race. I ended up being 'RBS Six Nations Man of the Weekend' for being extra specially good. I ran myself sick, as did everyone. I was supposed to sit out the command task to be used as brawn for the more physical tasks, but I substituted in behind the judge's back on the command task because I'd figured out where they were going wrong. Towers of Hanoi with tractor tyres, elementary, doncha know. I apparently lobbed bits of steel bridge girder around like a loon, in the same testosterone fuelled neanderthal rage that saw me taking over the assault boat we were paddling and beasting everyone on from the back. I'd be an awesome rowing cox, if only I were 40 kilograms lighter. Oh, and I forgot to mention the Hawaiian party on Saturday night. Awesome stuff.

Before leaving Cardiff

After the endurance race

Hawaiian carnage

And finally, this weekend Cardiff Company played Exeter UOTC at football. They had their names embroidered on their team jackets. We had this...

Check out the goalie kit... Go Sweden!

The girls, plus 3 of our guys to make up the numbers including me in goal, won 4-1. We lost 2-1, which we thought wasn't bad really, then went to the OTC bar to watch England lose to Wales. Gutted.

Word.

Cutest. Pictures. Ever.

I want the set.