Pot

Quote of the moment:
Fabienne: I was looking at myself in the mirror.
Butch: Uh-huh?
Fabienne: I wish I had a pot.
Butch: You were lookin' in the mirror and you wish you had some pot?
Fabienne: A pot. A pot belly. Pot bellies are sexy.
Butch: Well you should be happy, 'cause you do.
Fabienne: Shut up, Fatso! I don't have a pot! I have a bit of a tummy, like Madonna when she did "Lucky Star," it's not the same thing.
Butch: I didn't realize there was a difference between a tummy and a pot belly.
Fabienne: The difference is huge.
Butch: You want me to have a pot?
Fabienne: No. Pot bellies make a man look either oafish, or like a gorilla. But on a woman, a pot belly is very sexy. The rest of you is normal. Normal face, normal legs, normal hips, normal ass, but with a big, perfectly round pot belly. If I had one, I'd wear a tee-shirt two sizes too small to accentuate it.

- From Pulp Fiction, just for Jimmy.

Prill m8, that should be your response when your mummy says "you should lose weight like Will"... :p

Buzzed

Quote of the moment:
"Nice haircuts men!" - Lt. Harris, Police Academy.

I've finally got rid of the curls again. Being me, it was something I was told to do a month ago and hadn't quite got around to...

Old Habits Die Hard

Quote of the moment:
"Let me tell you a little story about a man named Sh!" - Dr Evil.

I haven't watched TV (or at least a TV of which I'm in control) for so long that I keep wanting to pause it so I can get up and do something or talk to someone. Not only that, but I'm reaching for a phantom spacebar to do it. Almost as bad as when I tried to mute my sister with the TV remote.

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This

Quote of the moment:
Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair
In 77 and 69 revolution was in the air
I was born too late and to a world that doesn't care
Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair

- Sandi Thom, I Wish I Was a Punk Rocker, otherwise known as the Podgy song. Done another rejig of the links list... that and Tiggerland are my favourites. Y'know... Tiggerland... the film, with Colin Farrell as Christopher Robin, leading his toys through training for Vietnam...

Coming back to the real world for one of those annoying random point updates:

I put my sister on the train to her OTC camp on Friday. Unfortunately, Broadstairs being a minor station and stop time seemingly being minimised, by the time I got on and dropped her stuff that I was carrying, it'd already started moving. Not only was I minus a wallet, I'd walked into the (small rural) station in bare feet. Fortunately the trip back from Margate was short enough for the conductor not to reach me.

Portugal vs Holland this evening was the worst refereed World Cup game ever. 16 yellow cards, 4 reds, numerous pushings, shovings and arguments. I loved it, why aren't they all like that?!

Finally, hence the title, I had an absolutely awesome dream this morning. I was escaping from a gang in a Hong-Kong-esque city, ended up in a canal, swam a raft out past some patrol boats, through the harbour, out to a random island, up a river into the island into a kind of canal/directed river flow, past some huts very reminiscient of Apocalypse Now, got passed over by some helicopters (sadly failing to play Ride of the Valkyries), ditched my raft, was wading up the river/canal when I heard someone pushing through the trees beside me, so I ducked in under an overhanging willow-type tree and then their phone went off... which was my phone alarm waking me up. Perhaps pizza last night added to my fertile imagination (all of it was beautifully rendered, though not entirely original... some heavy Lost/Apocalypse Now/Platoon/Farcry referencing) so I shall have to purchase some cheese and see what tomorrow night brings. I refer you back to...

Sixty Lengths Worth of Distance Swum

Quote of the moment:
Forget about it is like if you agree with someone, you know, like Raquel Welch is one great piece of ass, forget about it. But then, if you disagree, like A Lincoln is better than a Cadillac? Forget about it! you know? But then, it's also like if something's the greatest thing in the world, like mingia those peppers, forget about it. But it's also like saying Go to hell! too. Like, you know, like "Hey Paulie, you got a one inch pecker?" and Paulie says "Forget about it!" Sometimes it just means forget about it."

- Johnny Depp
a.k.a. Captain Jack Sparrow
in Donnie Brascoe.

All so true, except it's spelt more like fughetaboudit. See the pronunciation scene in Mickey Blue Eyes for details, you can't be any slower on the uptake than the classic Hugh Grant bumbling twit. My camp director last year, being from Brooklyn, was highly fond of it.

Goodnight, Mister Will

Quote of the moment:
"If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run..."

It's not just the twee awesomeness of Goodnight Mr Tom I'm enjoying, but the brilliant ancient advertisements. Fast-forwarding through the adverts is so not worth it, they add to the experience.

"...Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son."

Strike One

Quote of the moment:
“The era of procrastination, of half-measures, of soothing and baffling expedients, of delays, is coming to a close. In its place we are entering a period of consequence.” - Winston Churchill.

Retaking first year. Oops. Rents took it suprisingly well though.

Mr Bump

Quote of the moment:
"This experience has tested me and revealed no character whatsoever." - David Schwimmer in Six Days Seven Nights.



Oops... I think I'm still a trifle concussed. Been groggy since Thursday. I expect the lack of feeling in the skin down my right leg is due to the lump/gouge/graze on my hip, not the bump to the head though. It's all a bit mixed up, because my glands are also swollen, which I think is unrelated to Wednesday, and that's probably not helping with the woozy head.

A Fire Shall Be Woken

Quote of the moment:
"All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king."

Inspirational stuff... from the darkness may come light. But what did the candle say to the darkness? I can't remember the classic Rev. quote...

Not all those who wander are lost

Quote of the moment:
'What do you fear my lady?'
'A cage. To stay behind bars until use and old age accept them and all chance of valour has gone beyond recall or desire.'

Things to do this summer, part XIV: read LOTR again, then follow it up with the Silmarillion.

Procrastination-Devoid Nation

Quote of the moment:
...
I burned your incense
I ran a bath
And I noticed a letter that sat on your desk
It said "Hello love, I love you so love, meet me at midnight"
And no, it wasn't my writing
I'd better go soon
It wasn't my writing

So forgive me love
If I cry in your shower
...

- Your House - Alanis Morissette

Been listening to the acoustic version (ironically it's actually more heavily backed than the original, which was acapella) since it's one of the few albums I have on my laptop and everything else has gone home.

Today was all about... nothing. Did nothing of any use whatsoever. It felt wrong. Doing nothing of any use whatsoever is so much more fun and fulfilling when there are things you should actually be doing.

I Demand Satisfaction

Quote of the moment:
"Duelling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors." - random MSN Today link.

Freakin' sweet. All I need to do is get Moz into the Paraguayan embassy (and sign him up as a blood donor) and retribution for his filthy farting will be mine.

Raiding Party!

Quote of the moment:
"Does anyone love the sausage?"

Awesome night. Started with watching the first World Cup game from my flatmates paddling pool, set up just outside our windows... and when I say paddling pool, it had two hoses (rigged up to showers, best way available) filling it and its own electric filter... there were 12 of us in it. It rules.

Hit the booze (partial thanks due to Relm), went out to Fat Friday (at the union)... attempted to do a burning sambuca, was too sober for once, managed to spray it down my tshirt... classy... survived that, ended up dancing with some random girl... turned out she was a 3rd year, last Fat Friday ever, saying I was a first year was NOT the right answer... LOL... ah well...

Went hyper afterwards, was running round the station carpark on the way home... Steve either tryed to kick me or block himself with his leg, not sure which (but who blocks with their leg!?) and I ran straight into it and knocked him over and apparently he bummed his wrist... someone might be pissed with me in the morning/afternoon/whenever I get up. Oops. Sorry Steve.

Then went a roundabout route (complete with me doing hyper sprints up and down the road) to Martin's Act One (uni drama soc) house party... 'cept most people had already left, it being gone 2am. I was obviously indifferent to that. Don't they know who I am?! I'm the Juggernaut **Drunk Will** bitch! So after knocking a couple of beer bottles open on the gate (it was an awesome house, it effectively had its own beer garden) I headed out the back, found the charcoal and some sausages and baps (and some far too defrosted burgers which minged) and got cooking, because I was hungry. Ended up cooking for at least 15 people who turned up soon after. I was the BBQ king. They had marshmallows too... I was doing well with them, had them on a toasting fork, til I tried one too early and it burnt onto my lip. Oops. Anyway, my cooking was loved.

After a random conversation with a guy who was a musical counselor on a summer camp in Massachusetts (sp?) last summer and an icecream he robbed from the freezer inside, I headed home, to find Jay and Martin being crazy ninjas... so I ninja-d around the court with them for a bit, then went upstairs... since Ruth had left her light on I knocked on the door of K8 (flat upstairs in my block, me being in K1)... and it opened.

So, there was me, in K8. Well, obviously it was psy-ops time. They have nice labels on their doors and kitchen cupboards and stuff, so I switched all the door ones around, then swapped some of the kitchen cupboard contents and their labels around, then took their bathroom stuff and hid it in the microwave and put their bleach and stuff in the shower. Alriiiiight. Met a random bloke in the bathroom, but I acted like I belonged there and he was just like "Alright?". I was like "Alright?" and carried on putting the bleach bottles in the shower. Oh, and I put the loo seat up on purpose, before he appeared, but his presence probably spoiled that effect. Oh, and I built a pyramid of glasses on their kitchen table. OWNED.

Then I came home and got online. Am rather sooty, mildy burnt in a few places, still pretty drunk and starting to feel hungover, so it's off to Bedfordshire.

All in all... tonight was awesome :D

All Done :D

Crisis over. I listened to the stupid ABBA song til I was sick of it, wrote a damn emo poem, laughed at my own pomposity and got over myself. Life's good.

We Move Along...

Quote of the moment:
I dont want to talk
About the things we've gone through
Though it's hurting me
Now it's history
I've played all my cards
And thats what you've done too
Nothing more to say
No more ace to play

The winner takes it all... #

St Hildas College, Oxford, is becoming the final all female Oxford college to open its doors to men. What I noticed about the story, however, was that the photo included Liz Daplyn. She was whatever being my uncle's niece made her. Resquiescat in pace, Liz.

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along
Move along

Went shopping earlier, because I owed Paul a rugby ball for his one that I kicked backwards over my head and into an overgrown and ball-hiding garden. Oops. Also got some t-shirts (to horrify my mum, because I have about 50 already). Retail therapy. What a girl. Anyway, I can now fit quite easily into a medium, so I've found something to be positive about :D

Home

Quote of the moment:
"Let's drink til we can't feel feelings anymore!" - Podgy, quoting Peter Griffin. #

I haven't really done an emotional post since the first time. This first time. This was meant to be 3rd time lucky. Except nothing is meant to be and we make our own luck. We make our own luck. Nothing is meant to be.

A week's gone by. I'm back where I was, but perhaps... the footsteps of the week's journey are still visible. To overextend the metaphor, parts of the journey were... they were good, but on reflection they were bits that could've happened platonically. When the footsteps have faded and the memories have been refiled under nostalgia, I hope it is the same. I've done it once before. More's been said, more's been done, more's out in the open now, but fingers crossed. I want to be back home.

06/06/06

Quote of the moment:
"Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast, for it is a human number. Its number is six hundred and sixty-six." #

Have a satanic day, kids.

Jambo IS the Chosen One

Quote of the moment:
"I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle" - Topless Jambo, while waving his belly around the hall.

Jambo returned from a costumed birthday outing and decided for some reason to discard his shirt (belted to resemble the tunic) and carry on wearing the rest of his Anakin Skywalker garb anyway. It's not pretty. It is, however, most entertaining, and wonderfully soundtracked and filmed by moi.

Succubi

Quote of the moment:
"Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage."

Bit of a random occurence earlier... Two of my female acquaintances showed up outside my window, along with another girl and two guys, and they demanded that I go out with them... I was like, "At half ten, when I'm completely sober?", etc etc, but after some failed puppy dog eyes a deal was proposed: I had to go out if one of the girls I knew pulled the one I didn't. I didn't think they were that drunk, so I agreed, but they were... quite enthusiastically so...

By the time I'd got changed and got to the club, however, I found it empty as a beer-stocked fridge after a visit from Big James. Lacking a phone number and having produced nothing from the most likely ring-around candidates, I went home!