A Big Pile of Awesome

Quote of the moment:
"...and all those ridiculous shows on so-called "music television", like "Date My Sister's Cat" and "Pimp My Mom" and "Gyrate Suggestively For Cash While Having Your Bedroom Covered In Treacle By Supposedly Hot Faux-Skater Boys Who Enjoy Having Their Bottoms Stapled Together by Dwarfs While Nickelback Plays Loudly In The Background"."

Schweeeeeet. Awesome rant. Also awesome today were: going dog walking with my mum, wearing a (carefully weighed) 35lb pack (graded increments, doncha know) and making her yell at me because she was having to jog to keep up; going to Jim's with Will T and telling Jim's mum "Jim said it might be ok if we played tennis" despite Jim not being available at all - we figured if we couldn't get through, his mum couldn't, and warned him that he knew all along when he rang back much later; going to Will T's house to get some stuff and, due to his parents (wisely) not trusting him with the car keys and the attatched garage keys, having to retrieve his backpack from the garage via the back window.

The last was far and away the best. After we unscrewed the small top window with the handy screwdriver from my car, Will got stuck halfway in, the wrong way up. I then tried to post him through the right way up and nearly collapsed into the mess of rotting plums that covered the area, but eventually I, with the aid of the wheely bin, got through the window and managed to unhook my foot which was stuck on the sill and forcing me into a hanging splits. I wasn't really feeling the pain though, because my crushed nuts were still hurting too much.

A Worse Driver than Sarah?

Quote of the moment:
"Anyone for tennis?"

An eventful weekend. Attempted to go out to Braintree/Freeport for a haircut (another of these) and a present for Paddy about 1pm on Saturday. Eventually made it out just after 3, because as I was coming out of our side road just outside the house the car in front of me pulled out to go right, stopped across the near side of the road (like a retard, blocking any way past, instead of carrying on) and a motorbike hit his bonnet. It had braked a fair bit because the guy carried on in a pretty flat trajectory and hit the road about 5 metres further on.

An hour and 3 police cars, one paramedic, two ambulances and a fire engine later the motorcyclist was finally removed to hospital where he was diagnosed with heavy bruising on his back and nothing more. The firemen were there, by the way, to disable the engines so they couldn't blow up, not that the damage was that severe because both car and bike were started afterwards and ran fine with a missing bonnet and cracked shell respectively. An hour after that the traffic policeman had finished his measurements, talked to both automobilists and got around to taking a 30 second statement off me and asking if I'd be happy to attend court if the driver got charged.

The biker came back yesterday, complete with family, to give my mum some flowers because she'd been out there "first aiding" for an hour, which basically meant getting him to wiggle his fingers and toes and then holding his hand and making him lie still. Bless.

Paddy's party (to which I took a spankingly good pair of spirit level cufflinks, for engineering types) was overstocked and underattended, which meant more booze and hig roast for those who did attend, especially me. I did however manage to walk to the ditch and lose some of the excess supper, unlike Jimmy, who walked to the loo but later needed escorting to the ditch for a second round. Good effort, that boy.

Everyone was up suprisingly early, but I woke up with an obscene level of blood sugar, got so fidgety I tidied up (truly shocking) and then made people play tennis with me for about 4 hours, with a break for lunch. I eventually bummed off home about 6 and collapsed into bed at 11, which is earlier than I managed all year at uni. Oops. Woke up 14 hours later and have been playing MTW ever since. It's ridiculously absorbing conquering people. I managed, the night before Paddy's, to not look at the clock from 2am til my parents woke up about 9.

Total Shopping

Quote of the moment:
"Please stop your nipples staring at my eyes" - a t-shirt that walked past me in Bluewater.

Did some more very exciting shopping... USB Game Pad, PES 5 and Medieval Total War... even they're maxing out the laptop spec. Total War's winning on time commited thus far though. It's also retro enough for the cut scenes not to shudder.

Even more revolutionary, however, than me finally playing something other than Cossacks, is that I tidied my room today. Stuff had been accumulating on my desk, at least, since before I left for the USA last summer.

Danger! Danger!

Quote of the moment:
"Can you go here?" Jimmy, Will T and I can... 10 days left til Coillegillie :D

I got a spanky new tennis racket today (and promptly beat my long suffering Mother 6-4 7-5) and also this masterpiece: The Dangerous Book for Boys.

Swallows and Amazons

Quote of the moment:
"If you're going to be moving in to your resplendant new housing in Cardiff prior to the 15th/16th of September (as in permanently moving in, or at least being there til the 20th... I don't know why you'd go back early, but you might...) do you have a garden, and can I pitch a tent in it until the 20th when I can move in to my amazingly-organised-people-who-forget-to-go-in-a-proper-house uni house? I am required for some rowing jollities and anti summer over-indulgence measures, but have a lack of anywhere to sleep. Yes, I am a pratt, and yes, I brought it all on my own head, and yes, you may laugh. If you let me stay you can even treat me as an adopted feral stray and give me a collar that says Fido, if it takes your fancy."

- My begging email.

The page with the dates on for rowing also has a little man endlessly ergoing. I thought it was a brilliantly monotonous piece, with good use of stark colour contrast. Long-list it for the Turner prize. Definitely worth a gold star.

In addition to pre-season rowing training, I'm going to be doing some more messing around in boats. As well as a week in Scotland with Will, Jimmy and a dinghy, I'm finally going on a Royal Engineers potential officer "visit". It's a sort of combination things-to-interest-you and things-to-test-you event, Monday to Wednesday, and includes bridge building and a raft race. Scorage.

Dobriety

Quote of the moment:
"totlally dober" - Drunk Jo.

Impressive. She can even slur her typing.

I spent most of the day (under minimal duress) doing some destructive gardening, hacking at hedges and bramble covered verges, then building a huge bonfire. I was wearing my prized Walmart value boots and reeked of woodsmoke. It was almost like being back on camp, without the kids waving molten marshmallows near my hair.

Talk to Edward

Quote of the moment:
"Talk to Frank"



Sadly you don't get to talk to Frank. Instead, you can talk to Edward Thorne, Esq.



For a better detail downloadable Edward of your very own, click here.

Flixster Quizathon

Quote of the moment:
"What was the name of prince eric's dog in the film The Little Mermaid?"

My laptop is back from being repaired, complete with a new harddisk, disk drive and keyboard. I have an enter key. Miracles do happen.

I'm currently using it to play the new Flixster quiz, which is mostly trivially easy (being user compiled). However, I must still prove my geek credentials.

The answer, by the way, was Max. It was multiple choice, but I should still get kudos for getting it right having not seen the film for at least 10 years. It's not at all embarassing that I knew that. Honest.

Return of the Villi

Quote of the moment:
"Duh duh duh dun da-duh dun da-duh"

The burn strong on this one was. Pink, he was, hmmm? Peeling still, he is. More details later you will have.

Eat Ewoks.