Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Skype Up Your Life

Quote of the moment:
H.R. person: You know how sometimes couples get into a TIFF?
Lexque: Yeah, and some couples even get into a JPEG, or a PDF!
H.R. person: *buries face on table*

- The legendary Lexcie.

Gather round children. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin. Once upon a time there was a program called Skype. It worked like MSN Messenger, having a contact list and allowing for text conversations, but it also allowed people to talk to each other as if they were using the phone, for free.








<div><a href="http://www.skype.com" target="_blank"><img alt="Share Skype" border="0" height="60" id="skype-banner-img" src=" http://share.skype.com/show/flash/?id=27" width="468" /></a></div>



Everyone got Skype and talked to each other lots, both one to one and in conference calls, and they all lived happily ever after. The End.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Recipe for Disaster

Quote of the moment:

You're A Passed Out Drunk

Drinking gives you that warm fuzzy feeling, until you're thrown in the back of a police car...


There's a recipe for that. Take one Fresher, add one union nightclub ticket, stir in a few pints of lager, leave to return home, add most of a bottle of vodka, leave to sizzle, add water to sober up. Then rapidly add the special Big James "glass of water" and enjoy.

(Thanks to Steve for releasing the infamous photo)

Monday, May 29, 2006

X-Rated

Quote of the moment:
As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination. When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular. - Oscar Wilde.

In the meantime, there's X-Men 3. Awesome stuff, especially the Jean Gray bits. Wolverine continues to go on amazingly bloodless 12A-rated killing sprees on the slightest provocation, which is also good. Should you not have seen it yet, stay to the end. Goodies (and not in the baddies sense) hidden after the credits.

Should have been rowing in the Monmouth Regatta today, but because of the week of heavy rain the Wye was not only high but also full of flotsam of the rudder breaking log variety, which was also apparently building up around the piers of the bridge part-way down the course. So, no racing. We may be going to the Reading Regatta instead though.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Cinematography Challenge

Quote of the moment:
"What happened to the warriors at Thermopylae?"
"Dead to the last man."

- The Last Samurai.

Go on... you don't want to be revising anyway...

I've got about 90/100 films so far for the awesome LoveFilm picture quiz thing (including a couple of iffy ones). You have to spot the films referenced in the picture. Use the largest size backdrop (linked from the picture) for more detail, some of the clues are really tiny.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Willpower

Quote of the moment:
"Time to go running!"

In the last two days, I've been running at 9 both mornings (with Martin and then with Little James) and I did a half hour ergo tonight as well. I also ate 4 kit-kat chunkies last night while watching Man on Fire and have taken to licking Classic Woodsmoke sauce (the green labelled one) off first a spoon, then just my knuckles. Interesting contrast. Mmmmm sauce.

On the way to the gym tonight I saw Sideshow Bob coming the other way riding a bike with a mountain board across the handlebars. The hair and skin had changed to red and white, but he had the same face, especially the same nose, the exact hairstyle and the same "I'm on a mission to kill Bart Simpson!" look in his eyes. Most bizzare.

Finally, for those who have illegally watched Lost series two up to the appropriate point (at least episode 19) there's an interesting literary story here.

Lost: One Night's Sleep

Quote of the moment:
"What time did you get to bed?"

Mmmm. About midday. Started with The Da Vinci Code at the cinema, in which the ending's wrong and Audrey Tatou has disconcertingly enormous dark pools of eyes, and which I managed to watch in a different screen to everyone else, because for some reason the cinema filled one and then started filling the other simultaneous showing, with the cut-off point while I was trying to catch them up. It was puzzling entering the screen, to say the least, but I was dead centre in an almost deserted bank of seats with no contemptuous snorting from Steve, so I was fine. Steve, by the way, resembles Silas the monk almost as much as he resembles Smeagol.

Upon returning from the cinema I started watching Lost, Series 2, episode 9. I stopped during episode 18 because it was 9am and Martin wanted to go running.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Finland Finland Finland

Quote of the moment:
Finland, Finland, Finland, the country where I want to be,
Pony trekking or camping, or just watching TV.
Finland, Finland, Finland, it's the country for me.

You're so near to Russia, so far from Japan,
Quite a long way from Cairo, lots of miles from Vietnam.

Sadly only one of those was also in Eurovision.

In other news, I (plus Rhodri, Matt, Ruth and at least 50 more civil engineers who went to Come Play too) had my penultimate exam yesterday and since there are two weeks til the next one there was a small outing to the union. Being in the pub all afternoon too might have had something to do with this...

Steve and Rhodri get a wee bit carried away with pulling faces...

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Hooray Henry

Chuck-chuck-chuck!

Quote of the moment:
"I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne. Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky..." - I suddenly remembered my Professor Henry Jones.

Talking of Henrys, Thierry's staying at Arsenal. Hurrah! All the fuss about him moving to Barcelona and his lack of comment thereupon may just have been a cunning ruse to ensure they would give him a comparable pay offer. I rather like his story of it being the heart and team spirit of the team in the Champions League final defeat that made up his mind though.

Friday, May 19, 2006

OK Computer

Quote of the moment:
Distraction in the Time of Cruciality - a Podgy title.

Distraction for love... improvable. Laziness maybe? Cruciality for Cholera's nice though. Shame today's title (by me) was such an obvious one. My computing exam really was OK though. By OK, I mean I'm pretty sure I passed, which means by my current standard of performance I was on fire. After the guy in front of me left early I span his chair around with my feet and chillaxed with the feet up. Best way to do exams, I think. Maybe I should request it from now on.

Cutting to the chafe chase, a big debate was sparked last night. Tight boxers vs Loose. I favour the latter, but I included an "Other" option for those who think ladies love grey... Y-fronts.

Gonads and Strife

Which is the best type of underwear for blokes?
Loose Boxers
Tight Boxers
Other

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Beware the Sex Pest

Quote of the moment:
Beware the Sex Pest, my child,
The hair that spikes, the ties that match
Beware the Rowing Club and shun
The Lycra wearing batch


Contrary to the previous statement on the issue, since it's possible to access Facebook albums externally you might as well... click on the blonde monster if you want to see more.

Also, Jim lives. O frabjous day, callooh callay, etc.

Bleed With Me, Part Deux

The horse and the rider?

Quote of the moment:
You have bled with Wallace, now bleed with me.

I've said it before, but just in case you weren't aware that's the best line in the whole film, beating any of Wallace's speeches. Watched it yet again on Sunday night. Big up the S4C.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

What Shall We Do Tonight?

Quote of the moment:


Watch You Tube videos for 2 hours, obviously. Particularly ones of football goals.

I'm set to row tomorrow in an eight that will hopefully go to the Monmouth and Hereford regattas, made up of the 5 novice 1st boat guys who didn't make the all-star (senior + novice combined) henley boat plus 3 subs from the 2nd boat. As I'm overly fond of saying...

"A chance for Faramir, Captain of Gondor, to show his quality?..."

My rowing photos from the BUSA Regatta are online but only on Facebook, because I like the name tags. Consider it an extra incentive to join.

Little James: he's Dutch, honest.Upset-seeking underdogs West Ham were robbed of the FA cup by a thieving scouser. Steven Gerrard was eclipsed however by Little James, appearing on Liverpool's right wing. No matter how much he squirms, everyone who saw the match agreed it was him.

Meanwhile Jan Kromkamp's on a free loan to Momed AFC.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Eurgh

Quote of the moment:
"We have the cheapest bed and breakfast in town, and we have more bars" - Cardiff Police spokesman on policing plans for the FA Cup. #

Today was just... eurgh. Am ill. Been taking sporadic naps and doing pointless revision because it's not really sinking in at all. Got exams Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Boding well.

"I'm sweating like a rapist"

Quote of the moment:
"I'm sweating like a rapist" - the singer from The Young Knives.

Ended up going to see said band supporting The Rakes at the union tonight, my first gig since arriving at uni. Shame on me. Took Paul, Martin and Little James running around Bute Park this morning at half nine. They want a repeat episode at half eight tomorrow.

Saw Rowing James/Pest in the union pub after the gig. An hour later I got a rather alcohol influenced group message ending with this:

    "...Gd luck with ur exams & keep training hard... no one likes a fatty! Jxx"

In other news, Cardiff's now on Facebook, which for the uninitiated is a directory site much like Myspace but aimed primarily at students. Also, it has "pokes". So, like, totally join it, doofus.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

The Yawn Experiment

Quote of the moment:
"Women are fine tuned subconsciously to detect the qualities they are looking for in a man - just by looking at his face, US research suggests. Women can spot subtle signs of interest in children in a man's face, and accurately assess his level of the sex hormone testosterone, it claims." - BBC News article.

Does this teacosy-wearing oddball want kids?

Kids or not, he certainly wants to go to bed. Bed would be lovely. I always change my post time to when I actually post and that time is accurate. 6am and the sun is up. The late night began with work, but that petered out three hours ago. Damn Myspace and damn this pestilence for starting me on updating it.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Mighty Moshin Emo Rangers

Quote of the moment:
"Go go Emo Rangers!"

Not only awesome, but filmed in Chelmsford. I've been to that skatepark :D Not to skate, obviously, that was for people with balance. Anywhoo, look out for the particularly fine sweat bands.

Local news: next year's Union President was finally announced after a huge delay over a technical infringement. "GI Joe" won. I ranked him last (Single Transferable Vote), but I think he took the misogynist vote, being the only guy running against three girls.

Final thought: I used one of my new top quality Tesco highlighters for the first time just now to write a reminder on my arm and it smells like hamster piss.

Monday, May 08, 2006

Damn You, Damn the Pasta and Damn Pinsent and Redgrave

Quote of the moment:
"To be fair though, the only news sources I checked were reruns of Family Guy." - Maddox.

Page 27 of this week's Gair Rhydd features an amazing photo submitted by me of the capsized boat. I thought as Dan's guns didn't make it into last week's edition (probably because of the rowing dominated back page) they should get another chance. Unfortunately this week's edition hasn't actually made it online thus far (rare, it normally beats the paper copy to publication) so the link won't actually work yet.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

P^6

Quote of the moment:
"really? it's a post apocalyptic surrealist film, in which pingu and his little friend must travel through the land of ig to the great loo, down which they must flush the one fish. Y'know?

Three Fish for the Polar Bears under the sky,
Seven for the Walruses upon their floes,
Nine for the Harp Seals, doomed to die,
One for the Killer Whale on his dark throne
In the Land of Igland where the Shadows lie.
One Fish to rule them all, One Fish to find them,
One Fish to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Igland where the Shadows lie."


- spasm of Acid Will plagiarism caused by trying to write Highlander without an H key.

I was almost racing again today. I got a phonecall around half nine to tell me I was needed and would be picked up soon after nine outside the gate to Senghennydd Court, then a text around 11 saying James had got the numbers wrong and I wasn't needed. That was kind of fortunate, given I'd spent the evening at an alcohol-tinged BBQ and football fest in Bute Park. That said, no-one could exactly have had a healthy and sober pre-race week, given that we drank at BUSA, went out on Monday for the post-BUSA party and again on Thursday after the rowing awards dinner.

I didn't win anything, except that James, being an uber-cheesy git, got us all medals. We're all winners. Sigh-a-thon. The best awards of the evening were definitely the special catergories: the swimmer award (a rubber duck) for the Novice Women and a PPPPPP award for us, which meant a rowlock for Lawrie for forgetting to screw his gate up properly (the bit across the top of the rowlock which holds the oar in place) and it coming loose and letting his oar come out in the middle of a sprint race. Silly boy.

PPPPPP or P^6 means, of course, Proper Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance.

Friday, May 05, 2006

May the 4th be with you...

...Except that it's well past midnight, because it was the rowing awards dinner tonight. I was utterly astonished not to receive a prize, of course. There was some excellent Gwyneth style weeping from the 'Best Novice Woman', but she sadly ignored the calls from the peanut gallery (clump of Novice Men tables) for a speech. We really did want her to thank her mum, dad, pets, library books and everything else.

Anyway, it's now the 5th, which means it's Small's birthday. Small is also known as Sra and very occasionally Sarah. She's now 17 and legally unleashable upon the highways.

Just keep smiling and nodding...

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Primus Inter Pares

All men are not born equal. Humanity is tribal and rejects the "other", be it nationality, race, political affiliation or whatever, because the human race has grown upon the basis of all hunted animals: Together we stand, divided we fall. But there must always be a loser. Life is a race. Life is a competition. To come out on top someone must come out on the bottom. Socialism will always fail because on a small scale, helping each other may help ourselves, but kibutzes do not equate to countries. When everyone is equal and gets an equal share the strong are undervalued and the weak carried along. Survival of the fittest. helping the weak does not help the individual or the species.

What is life? Fear. Anger. Brutality. Discrimination. Discrimination is natural. It is human. It is animal. Looking down on the disabled. Looking down on the short, the fat, the short sighted, the dyslexic, the dyspraxic. Who will help me survive? Who do I want to hunt with? Who will hunt best for me? The strongest, the fastest, the smartest. Who will do best now? Who will succeed?

Inclusion is a noble aspiration, but discrimination is natural. Leave the weaklings to die in the snow. Compete. Strive. Struggle. Fight. Win.

There must always be a leader. There must always be us. We must survive. Not they. We. Us. We must be best, we must conquer, we must dominate. Such is humanity. There is no fair. There is no just. There is no honour. There is only the race.

Why recycle? Why go green? For the vanishing species? For Mother Earth? For the nobility of the cause? No. For us. For us to carry on for more generations. For there to always be an us.



It's strange what comes into your mind when you let it go blank. When the noise blurs in your ears into nothing more than the roar of the sea in a shell. When your eyes fix on the back in front, when your body moves in rhythm. Until you wake up at the end, there is only the race and the race is all about us.

Follow the White Rabbit

Quote of the moment:
When playing Bulldog during outdoor 'circuits' (we went for a run to the park):
James: "Hold the line, fellas."
Me, in a suitably gravelly voice: "Hold the line. Stay with me. If you find yourself alone, walking in green fields with the sun on your face, do not be afraid..."


I cba to do a precis of the photos from the weekend today, but I did get sent a link to the social sec's archive of the year thus far, including the night after Head of the Taff...

How not to down the oar...

...and a perfect demonstration, despite it being a certain fool's second...

...and what happened to said fool after said second oar.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Been There, Done That, Got the T-Shirt

Quote of the moment:
Biffin: "When you join the Army, are you still going to row?"
James: "Sure, I'll row for the Army if I can."
Biffin: "Do the coxes get mounted guns?"
Laurie: "It'd be like Mario Kart! Would it be a disadvantage being first in Army rowing too? Could your boat be hit by a red shell just before the finish line?"


All this before the minibus pulled away from the union.

Been There
Looking up the lake to the Nottingham Forest stadium just beyond the start line.

Done ThatOne of the closest races, with 1750 already gone.

Got the T-ShirtThe back's got cartoons'n'everyfink.