Alumni Felstedienses

The Wikipedia article on Felsted School lists among the notable Old Felstedians one General Sir Richard Dannatt (b. 1950), British soldier and Chief of the General Staff (2006-).

In other words, the head of the British Army. A real gem for Major Christmas... he may even have been the one who inspected the biennial parade the year after I left and presented Sarah with a birthday cake.

Are You Pumped?

Quote of the moment:
"Legolas, what do your elven eyes see?"

Are you pumped for Film Four coming to Freeview? It's going to make not having a job or anything to do all summer worthwhile. Ah... films.

The week's been good. I have been occupied. It was fun, kthnx, bye.

Just for Prill's benefit, in the last week there have been:

Jim's birthday. Went to the Green Dragon for lunch with Jim, Jimmy and Harry, where the legendary Tom Fell is now working. Legendary because of the Tom Fell song. It's a great song. You just sing Tom Fell over and over again to the tune of Amazing Grace. Freestyle verses between pure Tom Fell choruses are an optional bonus. Ah, the joys of CCF camp.

Minus Harry we went to Pirates 2, where Jimmy ogled Keira Knightley, Jim eyed up the voodoo chick and I admired Stellan Skarsgard's starfish. When we got back to Jim's, after some failed bunnyhunting, we went on a cross country trek to Tescos. Jim's airrifle went with us, which meant that we got in sight of it across a field and realised we should go to my house instead. It was while looking at Tescos that I asked Jim what his elven eyes saw and Jimmy got in a huff because that made him Gimli. He does have a pot though. What larks, Pip, what larks.

When we eventually surfaced the next day we returned to Jim's for a spot of tennis and overfeeding by his mum. Bless Jim's mum. She seems to think even I need feeding up.

Notable events since then: Will T came for a flying visit from Edinburgh and dropped in to spend more time here than with his parents. Charming young man. We were serving Pimm's though. Jim and Jimmy also came for some hardcore croquet action, which I took far too seriously and won with a complicated double croquet when all had seemed lost. I probably had the Smug Jambo Look (TM), although I think I avoided the victorious nodding.

Other than that, I have finished LOTR and the Hobbit and done very little of any use apart from a lot of dog-walking.

The One With The Stick

Quote of the moment:
"Halo! This is random but are u free on friday from about 3 to come with me to a wedding?! Will t was gonna come but now he can't (roll eyes) :p love kaz x" - How rare! Apparently Will T forgot about Music For A Summer Evening and said he could go, but alas, I'm due there to so I can't go and embarras Kaz m8 with my Travolta impressions.

Vicky brought home a couple of photos taken by 'Captain' Lee at the CCF Biennial Review. This one was particularly fine:


Does my bun look big in this?

The marching in the background fills it out rather well, methinks. A rare Chaz success!

A VERY Happy Birthday To Sarah

Quote of the moment:
"Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable." - John F. Kennedy

As I mentioned yesterday, the CCF Biennial Inspection was today and my dad went to watch. During the parade at the start, as is customary, the visiting General walked up and down the ranks 'meeting the troops'. This year the Yr 9 have been included in the CCF for the summer term in a 'Junior Leaders' company. Since a similar representative number of them paraded too, there were at least 40 kids there and the General decided to talk to every single one of them properly. Since the weather was overcast and rather humid, by the end of the parade on the Front there were 5 fainters!

Sarah was a known danger so she was placed on the front corner. Once the General had moved to the row behind her Major Eke sidled over, took her rifle and got her to wiggle her legs and arms while still standing to attention, because she was starting to sway. Unfortunately for the others they weren't so accessible. One other was swaying and had to step back and brace before standing back in line. One crumpled in place. A Junior Leader fell flat backwards to be caught by the person behind, but the most impressive according to my dad was Ed Hutley, another Yr 11 like Sarah, who lasted to the end but when ordered to fall out, got half way through the right turn and fell flat on his face.

Mr Christmas hadn't missed out on the fact that it was Sarah's birthday, so at the final parade her name was called out and she had to march up to the General's podium to be presented with a birthday cake. How awesomely embarrasing.

Victoria sent me a video she found while looking for something to talk to the visiting General about:

My Uncle In Afghanistan

There isn't a blood relationship, despite the way he seems to approach public speaking like me! It must be camera shyness because he's normally far more confident, if equally posh and plummy.

In other, obviously minor news: the elections. I voted for the Liberal Democrats for the local council elections and Conservative for the general election, due to the reasons given two days ago. Local issues are the way forward, methinks.

A Land In Turmoil

Quote of the moment: Which TV series began each episode with the words "In the time of ancient gods, warlords, and kings, a land in turmoil cried out for a hero"? - The Weakest Link. Prize for anyone who beats Jim to the correct answer(without using Google) :D

I went running again today... 3km in 15mins... go me! While I was lounging around afterwards Grange Hill came on, and 'Chalky', the guy who was in my platoon on my Frimley Leadership Course is still there! I'm guessing his character must be in the year below him(and most of us, apart from scrawny boy Will T). Anyway, I dug out my platoon photo, et voila:



Owen is the guy who was also on my aborted parachute course, and (although I didn't know it at the time) was going out with Paddy's little sister the second time I met him! 'Pimms man' was the lieutenant, who took a can with him to drink while we were setting a night ambush(that was accidentally triggered by three guys walking home through the forest from the pub).

Now more videos, as promised:
Doggy does Teddy
Doggy does Prillo
Doggy does Will T's head

[Edit 22:09 - My mum just announced that Zulu, our 4 month old puppy, did his first proper piss against a tree this morning!

Jim videos:
Hobo-Jim dances on the doorstep
Hobo-Jim begs in the hall

Enjoy!]

[Edit 01:27 13/1/05 - A special request from Rob that took almost 2 hours to upload:

"It was probably just spinach" - the original moment.

I'm yawning so wide I could swallow Prillo whole...]

Emo, Canada

Quote of the moment: "...it was just gorgeous. I wanted to cry."

Applicable to everything. Honest. For example:

"That Tesco Christmas jingle is just so gorgeous, it made me want to cry."

"Rob's new hair is just 1337. I wanted to cry."

"I saw the length of Podgy's latest post... it was just ridiculous. I wanted to cry."

Harsh, but SO deserved! I hope she does visit Emo during her Canada trip!

In other news, I went to the Rememberance Sunday service in Felsted today. It was suitably peace-loving, being taken by "Jolly John", the village vicar. And that was suitably countered by Mr Christmas' sermon about encouraging cadets to join the Army... LOL. The bugling was rubbish too. Plus: I took my camera. Joules was in full dress uniform. I zoomed in, hit the button, and the battery died. Poor Prill! Hehe!

[Edit 21:57 - Have just seen a advert with Destiny's Child promoting World Children's Day. 50p given to Ronald MacDonald charities for each meal (of some sort that I can't remember) purchased. Cue rant from Podgy :P]

Beating The Retreat

Quote of the moment: "This is the third fire alarm in 2 days! Will SOMEONE teach the yr 9 how to make toast?!"

Went into school today with my 'rents to see the aforementioned beating of the retreat, aka a Marching Band doing their thing on the front... Was quite pr0... It was the Band of the Parachute Regiment, and they had the Regimental Mascot... A Shetland pony called Pegasus... LOL.

Afterwards I wandered around on the Front and talked to Will T, Skippy and my sister... Then went over to Elwyns and talked to the "lads", as Rob would say... Henry Cullen, Will Richards, Pratto, Burrett (sporting an injury as usual - a black eye from Rugby already)... Prill, don't get too jealous though, cos A: His new, Xmas ordered haircut is poo, there's a fringe across the middle of his forehead, and B: The fire alarm went off after about 2 minutes... So everyone headed outside, which gave me a chance to inspect the newbies... There's a load of TINY Yr9... At least 4, Will Devitt sized... Plus Blackwell Min, who makes up for them by being rather rotund... And there's a new LVI German called Arnold - Seriously... :D

Camping it up, continued

Quote of the moment: "Oh yeah, I'm going on a major healthy-eating bash... I ate an apple today of my own accord" - Podgy

Super-mega-turbo-family-fun-size-lol-a-thon!

In other news, Will was shocked today by the generosity of his ancestors (the ones who are still alive, that is :D). More on that story later, after another extract from the saga of the first bit of Will's summer holiday:

Chapter Five: In which Will has a lie in...

Seeing as he cba to go back out onto the training area after the end of exercise, when we dropped off the OTC in camp, Major Christmas was unavailable to deliver me either. So I got to spend the night alone in the huge pig shed style barrack block... And was only woken in the morning when the cadets got back :D

That day was spent doing some signals stuff with a Sergeant who called everyone "Youse", and in the afternoon, a joyous time practising for the competition on Friday. Did the assault course in the muppet group of people who werent doing it in the comp, and cba to jump the water jump so walked through it... then had a shooting practice, then Tug of War... etc etc...

In the evening, a pair of pipers from a scots school were having a practise in a corner of the camp beyond the range... til a mob of Felsted types turned up and 3 yr 10 started mooning at them in time to the music :D

Chapter Six: In which Will proves he is a fat bastard

So, competition day. Our first event was at 9.30. So naturally, when the girls turned up at 6.45 to go breakfast (all in drill stuff already, as they were all in the drill squad for the competition), the boys were still in bed... Cue an entertaining scene as the aforementioned three yr 10 displayed their "Morning Glories" to Sarah Bolton when she came in yelling... :D For those of you failing to comprehend, that means the large bulges in the middle of their sheets... :D

As far as the competiton went: Drill - we won, w00t w00t, (yawn yawn :p), everything else, didnt do outstandingly, apart from the Tug-of-War, which we were owning in, but we got knocked out: there were 3 teams in our heat who each beat everyone else and one of the other two: We beat Brentwood, and only lost to Strathallen because two people slipped when we were hauling them back easily... but we got knocked out because one school had put out an all-girl team for the ToW to save their good blokes for the other things, and we, for a laugh, had lost the first of 3 pulls to them deliberately... So Brentwood won and Strathallen came second... but pfft, not like I was le bothered, just meant I could piss off and go to sleep :D Also, at the tug-of-war I was asked by the SSI (Senior staff instructor) from a school in the other heat if I could put on a Light Infantry beret and pull for them... I said wrong generation, my dad was in 1LI (1st Battalion, Light Infantry), he asked his name, and it turned out my dad was his platoon commander when he first joined the army... which was quite k3wl... :D

After that, the "pillage" party got into full swing... and I definately owned, coming away with a total of 6 garments of clothing with embroidered crests, and one Oakham brassard... Also, the older Oakham peeps remembered Joules as "that RAF guy who glowered the whole time." Lol.

Chapter Seven: In which Will goes home

So, next morning we're up at 5.30 to pack and clean out the billet... On the bus at 7.30, though I had to hop off and retrieve our "contingent cricket bat" as bought by Eggers on the way up... The bus was tres swanky, flatscreen TV and Dvd player with a case-full to choose from... So we watched Tomb-Raider, Finding Nemo and a couple of others I think, on the way down... We also drove right past the camp where we were last summer, and saw some other poor muppets doing the lovely up-hill assault course... Got back, got some very scared looks from the people staying in the school when we all hopped off the bus with rifles... Cleaned the rifles one last time, then put them in the armoury and had a final parade in "jeans order"(sigh). Then headed home... I stopped to beg the photo of me cuddling a sniper rifle off the pin-board though, which was nice. :D

End of the CCF Camp bit...

After that, got home, went and picked up the Childs from Bishops Stortford station, brought her home, unpacked kit, put out dirty stuff. Next day, packed stuff for parachuting, went to Chelmsford station with parent and the Childs, got dropped off, then parent dropped her off at the other station. Got to Andover station, picked up with most of the guys in the course in a pair of 4-ton trucks, (that's the flatbed ones with the canvas over the back), went to the Officers Mess at RA Larkhill. Very smart, as you'd expect. Huge dining room, own bar, etc etc... Sharing a room with a guy called Owen Larson who was in my section on the leadership course I did last summer. Next morning, went to the Airfield in 4-tonners, did morning's jump training in daft oranges jumpsuits (aka guantanemo suits, as we named them), then at lunch: There's a problem. For the first jump, you need 1.5 times the normal canopy for your weight. So although they had parachutes rated up to 300lbs, I'm over 200 so I was buggered... I'd have had to be 14.5 stone... OOOPS. The muppetous Captain who organised the course had even told the other guy over the limit that he'd be fine, cos no-one told her about the first jump rule... (She wasnt a parachutist, just a normal Artillery Officer...) So I came home the next day... bit shite really, but never mind, c'est la vie! But I will never be under 15 stone again in my life, unless I get starved in some Arabic prison... it's unlikely I'll be under 16... So pfft!

That's about it for the epic saga... Since then, I've just been bumming around at home, doing a bit of hedge-trimming, stuff like that... watching videos, playing PD on the N64, playing AOE II: the Age of Conquerors on me aged desktop vs me sister on her laptop... because this stupid piece of junk doen't have a serial port! So, as Rob said, pretty much... :D Havent persuaded her into cossacks yet though, but if Jim or anyone else wants to try then they can get their bums over here... :D

As I mentioned earlier, but forgot until I published and viewed, I need to mention today... Or more specifically, that I drove into Felsted (I was feeling too lazy to cycle) and cut my grandparents grass. Didn't take me long, maybe an hour, hour and a half at the most, and for this I was given coke + chocolate biscuits (ie all the incentive + reward I need) and also the princely sum of £7.00! My grand-rents 120><012! Lol... Speaking of which, was discussing his coffee shop employment in Tescos with Jimmy earlier tonight, or indeed this morning, and since he had to do absolutely nothing except fill in the form in order to get a job at Tescos, I think I might have a go... I have at least 4 weeks after the exam results week that I can work solidly for... (I'm canal tripping the week before that...). The only prob is that Jimmy's presumably working in Dunmow Tescos, whereas I would prefer Great Notley, as it's a 3 minute cycle... So he should drive to Great Notley and work there instead! :D Though we agreed my talents would be better suited to the butchers counter... :) Anyways, a plan to consider...

Meanwhile, that should have pushed me nicely over the 10,000 word mark... Go me! I know Podge is on about 80,000 and Prillo about 50,000 words, but I've been asleep half that time dammit! So the obstinate "Average Posts per Week" thing remains on 1... But I have 9 recent ones, apparently, though I don't know how they work that out... I suppose in the last month, because there were a few in the last week of term... Anyway! Enough of the Podgy style rambling!

That's about it from me... To finish, I have some lolage material from the KWS website... This is what Anna can look forward to...

Introduction
KWS cattle team is a co-curricular activity available to all students years 7 to 12. KWS has actively been involved in stud cattle and steer shows for over twenty years.Our studs consist of a long standing Shorthorn stud which has been successful at many shows over the years and recently Angus Stud has been established to compliment our commercial herd of Angus breeders.Students in the team learn all aspects of preparing stud cattle for shows. It enables our boys and girls the opportunity to develop nurturing skills involved with grooming, daily feeding and watering. This develops responsible practice for students in the team.Our aim is to give the opportunity to all students who would like to gain a knowledge of cattle husbandry and showing.

:D

I'm off to watch "The Three Musketeers"... the classic with Oliver Reed, Michael York, Charlton Heston, Faye Dunaway and Spike Milligan... W00t w00t... and maybe after that, "The Four Musketeers"... the second half of the original one long film, which the director chopped into two rather than have to cut it extensively... And maybe even after that, "The Return of the Musketeers", which does exactly what it says on the tin.  :p

G'night, childs!

CCF - Camping it up...

Quote of the moment: Hands off your cocks and put on your socks... LOL

Eggers m8, saying things like that only makes us mock you more... :p I'll put that in context further into my epic saga...

Chapter One: In which Will gets on a train.

A long time ago in a galaxy far far away, it was the morning after leavers and Will P went to Chelmsford station to take a train up to Stirling, in Bonnie Scotland... Twas the time for the annual coming together and getting bitten by midges, aka CCF camp.

We headed to London, tubed to King's Cross and hopped on the Och-Aye Express. We changed at Edinburgh, and as is traditional (ie it happened last year too) we cunningly chose the carriage on which the air conditioning would break down shortly after leaving the station, and had a very pleasant journey...

Having reached the wonderful camp, formerly the home of WWII German POWs, (the only changes are pointing the barbed wire outwards and building girls loos), we had a thrilling evening doing nowt. 

Chapter Two: In which Will gets his (latex-covered) hands bloody.

Monday morning for me was spent recceing the area of our little exercise on Wednesday, and in the afternoon I rejoined les petits soldats for the survival stand... Here we learnt moisture trapping, bear trapping, snare making, shelter building and animal preparation... The tres amusant instructor used the gutted fish as a glove puppet... :D

Now, according to the house rules, gutting a rabbit can traumatise anyone under 18, apparently... So, being keen to get bloody, I jumped at the chance.

MWAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA...
 
Ahem. Anyway, extra goriness was provided by the rabbit being pregnant, and the instructor trying to juggle the childs once I'd skinned it and slit open the belly... LOL. I am very wrong, I know, but he was awesomely wrong...

That night was spent in shelters constructed by les cadets, in groups of 5-8... And the seniors had to be split up among the yr 10, so I had a nice little workforce :D By lifted a felled tree onto the roots of another one which had been uprooted, and covering it with the sacking stuff provided, we had a shelter big enough for me to stand up in... not bad considering everyone else had to crawl... Mwhaha - SCHTOP. I don't know vot I am doing either... Soz!

Chapter Three: In which Eggers gets lost.

Tuesday was our range day. We started by being led a merry dance over two hills, by the aforementioned Eggers, when he took the instruction "just over that hill" as meaning go over the highest hill in that diection, not follow the instructor's Land Rover that had just headed along a blindingly obvious track... Fired MG's etc, and did a falling plate thing in groups of 10... Quite fun... We had a row of targets at 100m and another at 200m... the first lot got slaughtered, but the second lot survived pretty much unharmed...

Chapter Four: In which Will is a terrorist.

Wednesday was the day of our lovely little exercise... The "Enemy" (me, Major Jarman and 3 Univeristy guys from Aberdeen, including a Jim look-a-like who tied two red enemy armbands around his head to look like Rambo) spent most of it halfway up a hill covered in sheep and their excrement, making hot chocolate, next to a Secret Hideout - Extremely Dangerous (a S.H.E.D.). We were being observed by les cadets, who did fine until one group got scared when we wandered over to see why the bracken was moving and they stood up and pegged it...

I also learnt the exceedingly simple firing of mini-flares (point and pull the trigger-button), and when the O.T.C. trio woke up at last, we set out some trip flares around our S.H.E.D... We then settled down to await the imminent attack...

When it came, we knew when the Fire-support team moved into position on the hillside on our flank, because all the sheep ran away from where they hid... We then saw the rest of them because they stopped to prepare for the assault about 100m away, and Eggers stood up... clap clap... Rambo started shooting at him, but was then told to stop because we weren't supposed to know they were there... (Y) Yah!

So the cadets eventually ran up towards us, with smoke grenades going off, setting off the first flare nicely... they overran us and our S.H.E.D., tripped the next flare in the gateway behind us, then got attacked again by the other two OTC who'd run off up the stream bed near us when the attack started... They then headed back to their base by the other likely route to/from our position... Which we'd obviously put a trip flare on too... But this one was even better, because the cadet who kicked it did so so hard that the flare was pulled off its stand and was dragged along behind him by the wire wrapped around his foot... PMSL!!!11!1!!ein!ein!11ein!! 

The enemy, minus Major Jarman, then bugged out to ambush the fire support group on their way back... He stayed behind to look for his rifle, which had actually been nabbed by an overzealous Ed Hutley when doing a body search...

Meanwhile we set up our last trip flare across a ford on the track the fire-support were taking back... not only that, but it was about 50m into a wood, with a gate they had to climb over... So when they triggered it, they were penned in brilliantly... LOL... btw, the OTC had proper SA80s, not Cadet GPs, so they were firing off whole magazines on automatic... W00t w00t! Meanwhile I was popping off the last of the mini-flares over their heads, and laughing madly, of course... Lolathon...

Since I'm being bugged by my dear sisters to let them check their email, I shall finish this either later tonight or tomorrow... Ciaodles, if anyone actually checks my blog between now and then...

An Update...

Quote of the moment:
I want to do an Achilles on someone - Jim


So, as you might guess from the above, saw Troy tonight... but in the correct chronological order: Excluding the random one last night about the pics, which I have so far failed to put up, my last post was Monday afternoon... So since then...

Monday night - did a smattering of Chemistry Revision

Tuesday - Had my last exam in the morning. Went quite well, I thought... It was ironic that only Prillo hated it... When only Prillo DIDN'T hate the P3 exam, for example... After that, having meant to go home straight away, I hung around in the library, went to lunch, watched spaceballs with Will T, Jimmy and Jim, then finally went and packed up my stuff and went home... Study all clear but for posters and my fridge, which my 'rents picked up later when they went to some Netball Tour meeting thing... In the evening, went to a pub in North End, where met a minibus full of strangely familiar people... 3 hours later, Elwyns UVI apart from me (and Rob, Paddy and Anthony) returned to Elwyns in the same minibus... Along with Mr's Gwyther, Golden and Bennett, and our dear Matron who just happens to be the minibus controller... Even more tragic, the pub quiz machine proved too much for our combined mental power... (I blame the sports rounds)... We kept falling just short of the ***Cash Prizes*** (What a surprise!) but Mr Gwyther seemed sure we'd win... It was his money we were putting in, anyway!

Wednesday - Technically yesterday, since it's well past midnight... Thought I'd have a lie in... Overindulged a bit... Woke up around 1pm (quite good for me!) and was driven to Chelmsford, to buy a dinner jacket... Also got a present for someone, as an apology for being a muppet... However, due to not taking a charged phone with me, and not going home for a long while after then, I now need rather more than what I got. Eeek!...
Following that, I took my mother's car (she met me and my dad in Chelmsford, having gone straight from work) and headed off to Freeport, where I met Jimmy and Prillo, and we got rained on... Pril left plus one handbag and one cash sum extracted for teachers presents... I left feeling poor! After that, went into Felsted, picked up Vince, went to Jim's, found Jim's mum... Jim was a little trickier to locate, but eventually we spotted him as we combed his paddocks... He was wearing a classic farmer get-up, and walking his duck. Not dog, duck. Uhuh. Though it is an exceedingly cool duck... It got bored after I held it for a while, and tried to fly away, but its wings are still rather tiny, so it was a bit of a dive...
We then watched the Simpsons while Jim changed out of his farmer gear, and headed back to Freeport... Bought tickets, went to KFC, came back, watched Troy. IT IS K3WL. Has some rather amusing take-offs of Gladiator, among others, though I don't know whether they were intentional or just unoriginal... And it did make the 10 years seem like a week! But it was still pr0.
We then returned to my abode, at last, where Vince signed me book, and we indulged in a little goldeneye... :D those were the days, indeed... Jim also practiced his Achilles technique on a plastic bottle in my garden... With surprisingly impressive effects! I then finally got rid of the pair of bums around half two... Vince obviously returning by the traditional Elwyns TV room window route... Though all of this is technically on Thursday :D
I then managed to plug in my phone to charge, and discovered, as expected, that I had missed a phonecall and had a couple of unhappy answerphone messages to prove it... So I'm in le poop... How rare! I then logged on, and here I am... Far too much typing later... :D I also had a peek at Pikea 3... Quite pr0... And the phrase I was looking for yesterday in the library, the new "titty biscuits" equivalent, is "arse fez". So there you go!

Well, that's pretty me wrapped up... Tomorrow, I have to put in another far-too-early appearance in House at break time... Then it's CCF parade, where I have to unpack and repack my kit, to prove its existence and packedness prior to being shipped off to camp on Saturday with the yr 10... Which is nice! Then it's on to the relays and the great tug-of-war... Then the final club session and bbq... All in all, a day I shout have approached with considerably more sleep! It's starting to get light now, so I should probably be off to bed... I have successfully bumped up my word count quite a bit... And also written quite a lot of crap, all about ME! Hurrah! Well, I might as well glorify myself, no-one else will! :D

Goodnight!

Leavers book-ing...

Quote of the moment:
So long, farewell, aufwiedersehen, goodbye...

(The Sound of Music is pro, and you know it :p)

So anywayz, am in the library... Podge was here, til she decided to do something better with her time, and got me to write in her leavers book... Tis strange how I hadn't really grasped the whole "it's ending" thing til now... for someone whose ability to forget impending deadlines is legendary, that's hardly suprising!

I think also, having missed half the year, it doesn't feel like I have enough memories... I can seriously remember more of my first year in the prep school that of being in school this year... The good old days of my first meeting with the great Mr Spooner, throwing clay at the ceiling in Art (still doing that in year 9 :D), playing conkers on the "the downs"... my first "scrap" with paddy... Those were the days, indeed.

And what do I remember of this year? Hmmm...

- Some pro marching by Prillo at house shout...

- Jim and myself creating what looked like a burning sextoy in Baker's lab, one Sunday doing overtime Chemistry coursework...

- The same day, Jim making fingerless rubber gloves to look like a Chemistry Bum...

- Bumming around New Zealand, obviously, but that wasn't really school-related!

- My birthday, without the biology n00bs; Rob's 1337 bowling technique... Playing twister, and Paddy wedgying me so hard my boxers ripped... People (including me) using my dog as a pillow...

- Sitting in Maths lessons with Sheridan, and Jimmy trying to evacuate his bowels by coughing (or so it seemed!)...

- Falling asleep in Eggers lessons, droping my head onto my shoulder then jerking upright again... and Prillo and Jimmy having to stay behind for laughing so much they "disrupted the lesson"...

- Playing hockey at some school on my knees, because sliding on the mud was the pro defending tactic :D

- G.R. refusing to let me on the pitch the next match if I wore my humoungous shorts again...

- Severely embarassing Will T at a social by (slightly "merrily") picking him up and carrying him over to his chosen target, who he'd been too scared to approach... while he kicked and wailed on my shoulder... LOL

- Laughing at Will T about SAMMY MEGAHEY...

- Stealing Eglin's chair at the CCF dinner when he went for a slash, and putting it and his plate, mat, glass, knife, fork etc behind a curtain, then shuffling up to fill the gap...

- Being P0WNED over my chemistry coursework... soz Prillo! :$

- Going to the cinema with Paddy, Dan (as in the SMALLER ginger Dan...) and others who I can't remember... Trying to nick some of Dan's popcorn and him pulling it away so hard he spilt loads all over the people in the row in front of us...

- Turning up, for the first and only time, to a fitness circuit training session, and splitting my tracksuit trousers doing squat-thrusts...

- Having a coke while playing Cossakcs online with Jim, and him getting mad when I paused the game every time I felt like a sip...

- Squirting ketchup in Vince's hair in tea, and him p0wning me with a cup of milk...

- "Revising" in the library before my exams...

- House barbeque; Gwyther calls together the UVI when we're in his house afterwards, to tell us the whisky's for parents and guests only... and Vince already has a full glass of it... :D

- "Incest, incest, it's the best, put your sister to the test"... Especially the chorus of it in the LRH when Vicky grabbed me like a Koala and Eucalyptus tree...

ANYTHING ELSE?! I need more memories! And I need them all written down so I can't forget!