Dobriety

Quote of the moment:
"totlally dober" - Drunk Jo.

Impressive. She can even slur her typing.

I spent most of the day (under minimal duress) doing some destructive gardening, hacking at hedges and bramble covered verges, then building a huge bonfire. I was wearing my prized Walmart value boots and reeked of woodsmoke. It was almost like being back on camp, without the kids waving molten marshmallows near my hair.

Neighbours

Quote of the moment:
"Get the door - it's Will"

- the first thing produced by the sloganiser when I tried it. Highly appropriate. I've just got my housing assignment for next year. 64 Miskin Street. About as much effort to get to the K3/K9 as going upstairs to K9. They may not be impressed :p

It's also a very short stagger straight out the back of the union and plumb in the middle of studentville. I couldn't have picked a better place if I'd even considered trying...

In health news, women think they sleep worse sharing a bed, but they actually sleep better... men on the other hand sleep worse. No suprises there.

Halfway down

Quote of the moment:
Halfway down the stairs
Is a stair where I sit.
There isn't any other stair
Quite like it.
I'm not at the bottom,
I'm not at the top;
So this is the stair
Where I always stop.

Halfway up the stairs
Isn't up and isn't down.
It isn't in the nursery,
It isn't in the town.
And all kinds of funny thoughts
Go running round my head:
"It isn't really anywhere!
It's somewhere else instead!"

- A.A. Milne #

I saw this and thought of me :p

Mr Bump

Quote of the moment:
"This experience has tested me and revealed no character whatsoever." - David Schwimmer in Six Days Seven Nights.



Oops... I think I'm still a trifle concussed. Been groggy since Thursday. I expect the lack of feeling in the skin down my right leg is due to the lump/gouge/graze on my hip, not the bump to the head though. It's all a bit mixed up, because my glands are also swollen, which I think is unrelated to Wednesday, and that's probably not helping with the woozy head.

I Demand Satisfaction

Quote of the moment:
"Duelling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors." - random MSN Today link.

Freakin' sweet. All I need to do is get Moz into the Paraguayan embassy (and sign him up as a blood donor) and retribution for his filthy farting will be mine.

Raiding Party!

Quote of the moment:
"Does anyone love the sausage?"

Awesome night. Started with watching the first World Cup game from my flatmates paddling pool, set up just outside our windows... and when I say paddling pool, it had two hoses (rigged up to showers, best way available) filling it and its own electric filter... there were 12 of us in it. It rules.

Hit the booze (partial thanks due to Relm), went out to Fat Friday (at the union)... attempted to do a burning sambuca, was too sober for once, managed to spray it down my tshirt... classy... survived that, ended up dancing with some random girl... turned out she was a 3rd year, last Fat Friday ever, saying I was a first year was NOT the right answer... LOL... ah well...

Went hyper afterwards, was running round the station carpark on the way home... Steve either tryed to kick me or block himself with his leg, not sure which (but who blocks with their leg!?) and I ran straight into it and knocked him over and apparently he bummed his wrist... someone might be pissed with me in the morning/afternoon/whenever I get up. Oops. Sorry Steve.

Then went a roundabout route (complete with me doing hyper sprints up and down the road) to Martin's Act One (uni drama soc) house party... 'cept most people had already left, it being gone 2am. I was obviously indifferent to that. Don't they know who I am?! I'm the Juggernaut **Drunk Will** bitch! So after knocking a couple of beer bottles open on the gate (it was an awesome house, it effectively had its own beer garden) I headed out the back, found the charcoal and some sausages and baps (and some far too defrosted burgers which minged) and got cooking, because I was hungry. Ended up cooking for at least 15 people who turned up soon after. I was the BBQ king. They had marshmallows too... I was doing well with them, had them on a toasting fork, til I tried one too early and it burnt onto my lip. Oops. Anyway, my cooking was loved.

After a random conversation with a guy who was a musical counselor on a summer camp in Massachusetts (sp?) last summer and an icecream he robbed from the freezer inside, I headed home, to find Jay and Martin being crazy ninjas... so I ninja-d around the court with them for a bit, then went upstairs... since Ruth had left her light on I knocked on the door of K8 (flat upstairs in my block, me being in K1)... and it opened.

So, there was me, in K8. Well, obviously it was psy-ops time. They have nice labels on their doors and kitchen cupboards and stuff, so I switched all the door ones around, then swapped some of the kitchen cupboard contents and their labels around, then took their bathroom stuff and hid it in the microwave and put their bleach and stuff in the shower. Alriiiiight. Met a random bloke in the bathroom, but I acted like I belonged there and he was just like "Alright?". I was like "Alright?" and carried on putting the bleach bottles in the shower. Oh, and I put the loo seat up on purpose, before he appeared, but his presence probably spoiled that effect. Oh, and I built a pyramid of glasses on their kitchen table. OWNED.

Then I came home and got online. Am rather sooty, mildy burnt in a few places, still pretty drunk and starting to feel hungover, so it's off to Bedfordshire.

All in all... tonight was awesome :D

Jambo IS the Chosen One

Quote of the moment:
"I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle" - Topless Jambo, while waving his belly around the hall.

Jambo returned from a costumed birthday outing and decided for some reason to discard his shirt (belted to resemble the tunic) and carry on wearing the rest of his Anakin Skywalker garb anyway. It's not pretty. It is, however, most entertaining, and wonderfully soundtracked and filmed by moi.

Succubi

Quote of the moment:
"Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage."

Bit of a random occurence earlier... Two of my female acquaintances showed up outside my window, along with another girl and two guys, and they demanded that I go out with them... I was like, "At half ten, when I'm completely sober?", etc etc, but after some failed puppy dog eyes a deal was proposed: I had to go out if one of the girls I knew pulled the one I didn't. I didn't think they were that drunk, so I agreed, but they were... quite enthusiastically so...

By the time I'd got changed and got to the club, however, I found it empty as a beer-stocked fridge after a visit from Big James. Lacking a phone number and having produced nothing from the most likely ring-around candidates, I went home!

Recipe for Disaster

Quote of the moment:

You're A Passed Out Drunk

Drinking gives you that warm fuzzy feeling, until you're thrown in the back of a police car...

What Kind of Drunk Are You?

There's a recipe for that. Take one Fresher, add one union nightclub ticket, stir in a few pints of lager, leave to return home, add most of a bottle of vodka, leave to sizzle, add water to sober up. Then rapidly add the special Big James "glass of water" and enjoy.

(Thanks to Steve for releasing the infamous photo)

Willpower

Quote of the moment:
"Time to go running!"

In the last two days, I've been running at 9 both mornings (with Martin and then with Little James) and I did a half hour ergo tonight as well. I also ate 4 kit-kat chunkies last night while watching Man on Fire and have taken to licking Classic Woodsmoke sauce (the green labelled one) off first a spoon, then just my knuckles. Interesting contrast. Mmmmm sauce.

On the way to the gym tonight I saw Sideshow Bob coming the other way riding a bike with a mountain board across the handlebars. The hair and skin had changed to red and white, but he had the same face, especially the same nose, the exact hairstyle and the same "I'm on a mission to kill Bart Simpson!" look in his eyes. Most bizzare.

Finally, for those who have illegally watched Lost series two up to the appropriate point (at least episode 19) there's an interesting literary story here.

Lost: One Night's Sleep

Quote of the moment:
"What time did you get to bed?"

Mmmm. About midday. Started with The Da Vinci Code at the cinema, in which the ending's wrong and Audrey Tatou has disconcertingly enormous dark pools of eyes, and which I managed to watch in a different screen to everyone else, because for some reason the cinema filled one and then started filling the other simultaneous showing, with the cut-off point while I was trying to catch them up. It was puzzling entering the screen, to say the least, but I was dead centre in an almost deserted bank of seats with no contemptuous snorting from Steve, so I was fine. Steve, by the way, resembles Silas the monk almost as much as he resembles Smeagol.

Upon returning from the cinema I started watching Lost, Series 2, episode 9. I stopped during episode 18 because it was 9am and Martin wanted to go running.

Finland Finland Finland

Quote of the moment:
Finland, Finland, Finland, the country where I want to be,
Pony trekking or camping, or just watching TV.
Finland, Finland, Finland, it's the country for me.

You're so near to Russia, so far from Japan,
Quite a long way from Cairo, lots of miles from Vietnam.

Sadly only one of those was also in Eurovision.

In other news, I (plus Rhodri, Matt, Ruth and at least 50 more civil engineers who went to Come Play too) had my penultimate exam yesterday and since there are two weeks til the next one there was a small outing to the union. Being in the pub all afternoon too might have had something to do with this...

"I'm sweating like a rapist"

Quote of the moment:
"I'm sweating like a rapist" - the singer from The Young Knives.

Ended up going to see said band supporting The Rakes at the union tonight, my first gig since arriving at uni. Shame on me. Took Paul, Martin and Little James running around Bute Park this morning at half nine. They want a repeat episode at half eight tomorrow.

Saw Rowing James/Pest in the union pub after the gig. An hour later I got a rather alcohol influenced group message ending with this:

"...Gd luck with ur exams & keep training hard... no one likes a fatty! Jxx"

In other news, Cardiff's now on Facebook, which for the uninitiated is a directory site much like Myspace but aimed primarily at students. Also, it has "pokes". So, like, totally join it, doofus.

Bounce

Quote of the moment:
"And to end on a high note.. Check this." - the filthy minded April Lu.

I'm expecting a drinking ban next week, as there was for each previous race, so being led astray by an evil and malicious neighbour tonight was entirely excusable. Smacking Steve's drink onto the floor on the other hand was obviously entirely the fault of said neighbour. Shocking behaviour on her part, really.

In other news, I'm sunburnt from the two days of relatively cloudless warmth we've just had. From past experience I should be a nice "unwashed tramp" shade of brown by the end of the week.

How Fast Can You Run?

Quote of the moment:
"How fast can you run?
As fast as a leopard.
How fast are you going to run?
As fast as a leopard."

- From Gallipoli, in which Mel Gibson earned his Brit-bashing spurs.

Some vital new research shows that gamers perform better when they've slept well. Jim, take note.

ARGH! IT'S JAMBO!

The people ran in fear from the ghastly spectre that was the-artist-formerly-known-as-Big-James. A very drunk Jambo was on the loose...





It is of course possible that Little James was actually advertising anti-perspirant and the images are in reverse order...

"Look, no sweat patches!"

"Oh my!"

"Gee whizz!"

"Kiss me now!"

P.S. I saw Marc Warren in town today. Most well known for Hustle, but I thought of Band of Brothers. Best... series... ever...

Bol'l'ovck;s

tan#go sprayin#g evcerywere n#ear deask; = major l'aptop probl'ems. tis is after givcin#g it a few ours to dry out. peraps sme more, toug m n#ot opeful'.

Leek Pancakes

Quote of the moment:
"Popular children's show Rainbow is to return, 14 years after it was taken off TV screens." - BBC News.

We had snow today. Hurrah! Midway through Soil Mechanics our lecturer suddenly said "Oh, it's snowing!" and couldn't get quiet for the rest of the lecture because of people talking about getting home in the snow. By the time we got outside, of course, it had stopped.

I got home from pancakes tonight to find that the kitchen was full of my flatmates and associated hangers on being cooked pancakes by Claire and Jenny from next door. How awesome! I was pressured into having one to prove the rude comments by the others wrong, but I got the first one made from the second batch of batter and it was awesome.

In other news, the same lecturer told us that a load of (mostly) castles are offering free entry tomorrow because it's St David's day. Hopefully leek will be predominate in tomorrow's supper. Mmmm leek. Sadly Cardiff Castle isn't one of them. Spoilsports.

Heroes

Quote of the moment:
It may sound absurd...but don’t be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but won’t you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream

- Superman by Five for Fighting, the music on my newly tarted up Myspace. It's amazing what can be accomplished between laundry runs.

Also, while on my way to collect another load, I decided to be charitable and retrieve a broom from a bush outside the block next to the laundry. Since it was labelled with the ground floor flat number I rang the bell and left it propped in their doorway, and it was only when I got back and took my hoodie off that I realised Zorro was hiding in the bush. Catherine Zeta Jones must have been menaced by bandits on a family visit and required rescue. That, or Puss-in-Boots is trying to stir up trouble.

On the topic of heroes, Little James had a Top Gun pub-crawl last wednesday. He's never actually seen the film, but all he needs is a leather jacket and he'd be away! Goose though, not Maverick... he's far too tall (plus Goose gets Meg Ryan, Maverick only gets Kelly McGillis - that's what you get for being a short-arse...)

Ginger Nuts

Quote of the moment:
First-year Cardiff University student Matilda Clare Cooper, who had recently celebrated her 19th birthday, was found dead at Talybont Halls of Residence, Gabalfa. - ICWales.

Went rowing down in Cardiff Bay for the first time. The stretch there goes from the boat club up to the Millenium Stadium. Should be interesting rowing there tomorrow in the pre-match build-up, since we got a libation of beer from the bridge by the stadium today.

Laptop disc drive's refusing to recognise DVDs, run out of books from Christmas, played the games I have to death years ago. Very, very bored. Went to the new Tesco Metro just up the road, but it shut just as I got there. Suffering from an acute shortage of ginger nuts.